Specialist
I have heard people talk about the “midlife crisis” as if it were a disease you catch or comes over you.
If chickenpox belongs to childhood life crisis belongs to adulthood. Once you hit the late forties that's it. You are gonna get it, right?
In fact is so widely accepted that it has been pictured in movies for years now. There's the family man who unexpectedly quits his job and decides to go on a Harley tour of the US leaving his wife and two kids behind. There's the loving wife who fed up with being an unappreciated stay at home mum signs up for law school...
The thing is, movies tend to focus on the funny and entertaining parts of this process and usually fail to report the most ugly moments some people go through. Moments I witness when my clients break down in front of me not knowing how they got where they are in life or why they are so unhappy. All they know is they seem to be going through a midlife crisis and don't know how to get out of it.
To me, this invention of modern society is nothing but another excuse like the many we like to come up with so we can feel bad about ourselves for a while once again. Cause there is nothing like feeling down in the dumps. If you feel bad in your forties about things you didn't do in your twenties what does that say about you?
Some of you might already be thinking... "Who do you think you are to talk like that about something you haven't been through yourself? Wait until you are my age and talk to me then!
The reason I am talking to you now is because I believe I can help you and if I can do that on any level, I will be as happy as you will too. It is the accumulation of moments that make you really happy throughout your life that can prevent you from future regrets.
Many people have regrets about what they did or didn't do in their lives. They feel trapped, fed up with life, unappreciated, unmotivated, unexcited... Some people wallow in their sorrows feeling sorry for themselves waiting for other people to make them feel better, waiting for something good to happen in their lives. Other people go to therapy and spend the rest of their lives and their money trying to figure out who they are and what they want. Only a minority decide to "what the heck" set out to live the life they always wanted to live: go on that round the world trip, start their own business, get a makeover, find the partner of their dreams...
Different people respond to life events in different ways. Those who have a more effective response mechanism will get the best outcomes or rewards. By a more effective response mechanism I mean a response that is more useful and beneficial to you, your physical and mental health, and your happiness. Things happen, good and bad. Some we can control, some we can't.
It is the ability to make a conscious decision and believe that whatever happens you will be ok and that you can start over and do the things you want to do in life right now.
If you are going through one of those not so good periods, take a moment to write down all the things, big and small, you do love about your life and are truly grateful for. How about living in a nice house? Or your children being healthy and happy? When you appreciate your life you can feel more appreciated too.
Next, take time to jot down a list of 50 goals you want to achieve. Big and small. Put them up somewhere where you can go over them everyday and start taking steps towards achieving them. Our mind is wired for achievement. We generally work better and feel better when we get things done. For example, how amazing do you feel when you get that workout done? How proud of yourself?
Start taking better care of yourself. Treat yourself good. Take that well deserved bubble bath, go for a walk in the countryside, read a book, buy yourself something nice... schedule YOU time every week to do things you want to do on your own. Get to know and love yourself and notice how much more contented and fulfilled you feel.
Being in great form is a conscious decision you can make and like a habit the more you practice it the better you get at it.
Let me know how you get on!
Anna Aparicio
IINLP Life & Success Coach, IINLP Master Practitioner, Reiki 2
Practitioner
Delite Life Solutions.
086 065 63 83
anna@delite.ie
www.delite.ie